Couples Therapy for Mismatched Sexual Desire & Desire Discrepancy ● AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist ● Practicing Therapy Since 1988
Sex Therapy for Fort Lauderdale Couples with Differences in Sexual Desire
Online sex therapy for Florida couples in Fort Lauderdale and across Broward County and Palm Beach County
Sex Therapy for Fort Lauderdale couples
You and your partner have been together for 15 or 20 years. You know each other’s routines, and you still like spending a Saturday together. But over the years, one of you has come to want sex more often than the other does, and the difference in sexual desire has grown wider than either of you expected.
Early in your relationship, sex happened often and without much planning. As the years went by, each of you figured that desire fades in every long-term relationship, so the change didn’t seem like a problem at first. Now sex happens a few times a year.
If you’re the partner who wants less sex, you love your partner, and you enjoy physical affection that doesn’t lead to sex. When sex comes up after years of the same conversation, you feel pressured, and you’re frustrated that the conversation never seems to change.
If you’re the partner who wants more sex, you miss the sex the two of you used to have. After years of asking and hearing no, you’ve started to wonder whether your partner still wants you, and whether sex will ever be a regular part of your relationship again.
You still enjoy each other’s company. On a Saturday morning, the two of you bike the park drive at Hugh Taylor Birch State Park and then paddle a rented kayak on the park’s lake.
At home that night, the two of you watch a movie on the couch. When the credits roll, one of you says good night and heads to bed. The other stays on the couch a little longer, wishing the evening had ended differently.
Couples of every kind feel a difference in sexual desire in a long-term relationship. The two of you might be a man and a woman, two women, or two men, and one or both of you might be trans or nonbinary. Whoever the two of you are, I work with couples like you.
Desire discrepancy is the clinical name for an ongoing difference in how much sex two partners want.
But a difference in sexual desire that has lasted for years can still change. There’s hope. With sex therapy, many couples in long-term relationships start enjoying sex together again, and the two of you can, too.
Kate McNulty, LCSW, LICSW | AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist & Certified Gottman Method Couples Therapist
I help Fort Lauderdale couples in long-term relationships enjoy sex together again.
For more than fifteen years, I’ve helped couples understand what’s contributing to their differences in sexual desire and address the difficulties affecting their sexual relationship.
After years or decades together, a difference in sexual desire can leave the two of you feeling distant in everyday moments, too, which is why I use training that addresses both sex and your relationship.
As a sex therapist certified by AASECT, the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists, I treat low desire, mismatched desire, and other problems with sex itself. As a certified Gottman Method couples therapist, I help partners support each other through everyday stress, using an approach built on research with couples. I also train other therapists, as an AASECT Approved Supervisor and a Gottman Method trainer.
I see the two of you together because I want to understand both partners’ experiences of sexual desire and how your sexual relationship has changed over the years.
I’ll assess what’s contributing to the difference, including changes in arousal, sexual enjoyment, physical health, and your relationship. I’ll also help you discuss what years of asking for sex and hearing no have been like for each of you, so we can address both the sexual concerns and the hurt that has developed between you.
Here’s what you can expect from me as your sex therapist:
We talk about sex directly, in plain words, and sex stays at the center of our sessions.
I’ll use what we learn during the assessment to recommend treatment suited to your relationship. That may include addressing difficulties with arousal or sexual enjoyment, changes in physical health, relationship concerns, or using structured touch exercises when appropriate. We’ll choose interventions that respect both partners’ comfort and sexual interests.
I take both of your experiences seriously, whether you’re the partner who wants more sex or the partner who wants less. The partner who wants more sex won’t be told that wanting sex is the problem, and the partner who wants less sex won’t be asked to say yes when they don’t want to. Together, we work toward sex you both look forward to.
We meet by secure video, and you’ll both need to be in Florida during each session.
How your relationship changes after sex therapy with me
Without the right support, the distance between you can grow. The longer the two of you go without sex, the more awkward starting again can feel.
In our sessions, I ask each of you how sex has changed over your years together. While one of you talks, I help the other partner listen without getting defensive or shutting down.
Many couples learn that both partners miss part of the early years: the partner who wants more sex misses sex itself, and the partner who wants less sex misses physical affection without pressure.
Once I understand what’s contributing to your differences in desire, I’ll recommend treatment based on what each of you needs.
If physical affection has become difficult, structured touch exercises may help you enjoy intimacy without expectations about sex.
If changes in arousal, sexual satisfaction, physical health, or relationship difficulties are contributing, we’ll address those concerns directly.
We’ll review how treatment is working for both of you and adjust our approach when necessary. For example, if the two of you planned an evening alone but fell asleep during the movie, we might explore whether a Saturday afternoon would be a better time for intimacy.
If you’re the partner who wants more sex, you can express sexual interest without feeling that you’re starting another argument. You understand more about what affects your partner’s desire, and you can enjoy sexual experiences that feel genuinely wanted and satisfying to both of you.
If you’re the partner who wants less sex, you can enjoy physical affection without feeling pressured to have sex. You understand more about what makes sexual intimacy pleasurable and appealing to you, whether that involves a weekend away, an evening without screens, or different kinds of sexual activities.
You can say yes when you want sex and no when you don’t, while knowing that your preferences and comfort are just as important as your partner’s.
Over time, the two of you feel close in every part of your relationship again. When the movie credits roll on a Saturday night, the two of you go to bed together.
Who is a good fit for sex therapy for Couples with desire discrepancy?
Sex therapy for desire discrepancy works best when both partners attend sessions and both want a more satisfying sex life together.
You don’t have to agree on what caused the desire gap or feel equally motivated to close it. You only need to be willing to try.
I also work with couples where one or both partners are autistic and/or have ADHD, and LGBTQIA+ and polyamorous or open-relationship couples and individuals, since standard sex therapy frameworks were built on neurotypical, heterosexual, monogamous, cisgendered assumptions that don’t fit every relationship.
If there’s ongoing domestic violence in your relationship, sex therapy isn’t the right starting place; individual therapy is safer.
A certified sex therapist and couples therapist with more than 15 years treating differences in sexual desire
I’m Kate McNulty, LCSW, LICSW
I’ve been a therapist since 1988, and for more than 15 years, I’ve helped couples whose differences in sexual desire have become a source of frustration, hurt, or uncertainty about their relationship.
As both an AASECT-certified sex therapist and a Certified Gottman Method Couples Therapist, I bring two areas of specialized training to your treatment. I can assess how sexual desire, arousal, physical health, sexual satisfaction, and relationship difficulties influence one another, including concerns that aren’t immediately obvious to either partner.
Couples can spend years trying to improve their sexual relationship without understanding why their desires differ. I’ll help you identify what’s contributing to the problem and address those issues so you can build a sexual relationship that feels satisfying to both of you.
If the description on this page sounded like your relationship, I’d like to help.
Logistics
Pricing, scheduling, and online sex therapy sessions
All sessions are conducted by secure, HIPAA-compliant video. I work with couples across Fort Lauderdale, Broward and Palm Beach counties, and the rest of Florida.
Sessions are private pay, billed at $500 per hour and $750 for 90-minute sessions. Extended sessions (3+ hours) are available for couples who want to make faster progress.
I am not in-network with insurance and cannot bill them directly. For more information about pricing, please see the pricing page.
How to get started in sex therapy
To schedule your first appointment, please choose a day and time on my secure, HIPAA-compliant calendar using the button below.
After I approve your request, typically within one business day, you and your partner will receive new client forms via email, which you’ll both review and digitally sign before we meet.
Areas served in Fort Lauderdale, Broward County, and Palm Beach County
I’m registered as an Out-of-State Telehealth Provider with the Florida Department of Health (registration #TPSW16), which allows me to work with couples across Fort Lauderdale, Broward County, and Palm Beach County by secure, HIPAA-compliant video.
In Fort Lauderdale, I see couples in Downtown, Victoria Park, Coral Ridge, Harbor Beach, and Rio Vista.
Along the coast and in northern Broward County, I see couples in Wilton Manors, Lighthouse Point, Hillsboro Beach, Coral Springs, and Parkland.
In western Broward County, I see couples in Plantation, Davie, Cooper City, Weston, and Southwest Ranches.
In Palm Beach County, I see couples in Boca Raton, Highland Beach, Wellington, Palm Beach, Palm Beach Gardens, and Jupiter.
If you’re anywhere in Broward County or Palm Beach County, I can work with you.
Common Questions About Sex Therapy for Fort Lauderdale Couples with Desire Discrepancy —
-
Yes. After many years together, the two of you have trust and shared routines to build on. In our sessions, we look at how sex has changed over your years together, and we build a plan for physical affection and sex that fits your relationship now
-
Yes. I work with couples of every gender and sexual orientation, including same-sex couples and couples where one or both partners are trans or nonbinary. In our sessions, we talk about sex in the words that fit your relationship.
-
Yes. For example, one of you can join from an office in Miami and the other from home. You’ll both sign on to the same secure video link.
Each of you will need a private space and a reliable internet connection.
-
No. I’m not in-network with any insurance company, and I don’t provide Superbills for couples sessions. You’re welcome to use your HSA or FSA card for our sessions.
Still have Questions about sex therapy for desire discrepancy?
Please contact me using the button below. I will respond within 2 business days.